Proof That AI Sucks at Writing

 

This week, I tried several times but failed to catch inspiration by the tail.

 

Instead, I caught a sore throat, and a potentially scratched eye, and caught news that a root canal is in my near future.

 

I caught up on sleep by way of much-needed naps.  These were the best catches especially as the March weather has mostly been a barely bearable kind of heat that keeps me from thinking with any kind of focus in the afternoons.

 

As my Thursday came to a close, I drafted disappointing words I could not publish before a treacherous thought crossed my mind: What would Chat AI do?

 

AI threatens us writers. I refuse to be less than human when I turn to my pages and create (or leak) my stories.

 

But, as it’s almost dinner time and a friend is coming over soon, I opened up the ol’ AI Chat Box thingy to see what it could do.

 

I don’t like it.  But I want to be its friend. (Especially if/when AI takes over the world, I want them to remember me as “the nice one”.)

 

Anyway, below is the actual script copied and pasted from when I put my hand up for help from AI to find inspiration for this week’s post.

 

Me: Hi

 

AI: Hello! How can I assist you today?

 

Can you please give me a paragraph that is inspirational, pithy, and slightly humorous, but connects with humans?

 

Sure, here’s a paragraph that meets those criteria:

Life is like a rollercoaster – full of ups and downs, twists and turns, and occasional moments of pure exhilaration. But remember, just like on a rollercoaster, the most exciting parts of life are often the most terrifying. So buckle up, hold on tight, and enjoy the ride. And if you happen to lose your lunch along the way, well, that’s just part of the adventure. The important thing is to keep going, keep pushing through the fear and uncertainty, and trust that the ride will ultimately take you to an amazing destination.

 

Can you give me something similar, but the metaphor be nature themed, like the ocean maybe, instead of a roller coaster?

 

Sure, here’s a paragraph using a nature-themed metaphor:

Life is like the ocean – it ebbs and flows, with tides that rise and fall, and currents that can be both gentle and fierce. The ocean is vast and sometimes overwhelming, just like the challenges that life can throw at us. But like a skilled sailor navigating the open sea, we must learn to adapt and stay afloat, even when the waters get rough. And just as the ocean is home to a diverse array of marine life, each with their own unique beauty, so too is life full of amazing experiences and opportunities. So dive in, ride the waves, and enjoy the journey, because you never know what wonders lie beneath the surface.

 

Well AI, that’s pretty darn good.

 

Thank you! I’m glad you like it. Let me know if there’s anything else I can help you with.

 

Can you recreate the paragraph again, but this time, let’s go galactic? Can you give me a paragraph that is inspirational, pithy, and slightly humorous, but connects with humans that is star or galaxy themed?

 

Certainly, here’s a paragraph using a star or galaxy-themed metaphor:

Life is like a journey through the cosmos – a vast expanse of space and time, full of wonders beyond our imagination. Just as the universe is home to countless stars, each shining bright and unique, so too are we all individuals, with our own gifts and talents to share. But like a comet hurtling through the cosmos, we must also navigate the challenges and obstacles that come our way. And yet, even in the darkest reaches of space, there are always glimmers of light to guide us. So keep your eyes on the stars, and let them be your inspiration as you journey through the universe of life. And remember, just like the universe itself, there is no limit to what you can achieve.

 

Well. That’s definitely thought-provoking and comforting. Especially the “darkest reaches of space” and “glimmers of light to guide us” part. But . . . I don’t think comets actually navigate obstacles, do they? I thought they crashed into them.

 

You’re correct, comets can’t really navigate obstacles like spaceships can. Thank you for bringing that to my attention! Here’s a revised version of the paragraph that should be more accurate:

Life is like a journey through the galaxy – a vast expanse of stars and planets, each with its own story to tell. The universe is full of mystery and wonder, just like the journey of life. We must navigate the cosmic forces that shape our existence, much like the gravity that holds planets in orbit around the sun. But like a shooting star blazing through the night sky, we can also leave a trail of brilliance behind us, inspiring others to follow in our footsteps. So let your light shine bright, and journey through the cosmos of life with a sense of wonder and curiosity. And remember, just like the universe itself, there are infinite possibilities waiting to be discovered.

 

Hmm. the “shooting star blazing” and leaving a “trail of brilliance” is good stuff, but . . . is gravity holding planets in orbit the same as humans navigating cosmic forces? That’s not accurate and probably a little too dense for what I am looking for.

 

Can you give me ONE powerful sentence that is inspiring, heart-warming, nature-themed, accurate, and will leave readers feeling uplifted on their Friday?

 

Sure, here’s a powerful and uplifting sentence for you:

Just as the sun rises each morning, lighting up the world with its warmth and radiance, so too can you rise each day, shining your light and spreading positivity and joy to those around you.

 

Whelp. That’s kinda overplayed, but you’ve done a much better job than I have in finding the words for this piece. Thanks for your help, Mr/s AI.

 

You’re welcome! I’m happy to help. If you need any further assistance, don’t hesitate to ask.

 

Enjoy your weekend.

 

Thank you, you too!

 

So there.  Proof that AI sucks at writing blogs as much as I have this week. Even if I underperformed as a writer, I definitely didn’t employ metaphors that don’t make any sense, or seem so cliché, their words feel hollow.

 

What I do know, is whenever I sink into a space where creativity and inspiration lack, it only means brilliance is sure to soon be found, not trailing behind me, shooting-star-like, but on the other side of the weekend. I just have to wait.

 

~ Christy

 

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